"[Anik: Well, you have a big team.] Well, that hasn't mattered. i thought it would be advantageous to bring big men who could withstand punishment, but I could have done this with little girls."

– Teppo Maki at 0:35

"[Teppo: We are not scared of them.] Hear that, Shoresy? They're not scared of you."

– Anik at 1:22

"National champs and now we're backseats to cover bands."

– Ziigwan at 3:30

"[Cory: Fuckin' terrible call.] Oh, you want to talk about a terrible call? Your Mom FaceTime'd me when I was watching videos on my phone with Liam's mom. [Cory: You should download DuoLingo on there for when the Euros skate circles around you in 6 languages.]"

– Shoresy at 3:43

"Heard the EU's game plan: Fee fi fo fum. Stick it straight up Shoresy's bum."

– Liam at 3:50

"Gonna get us kicked out of NATO for not contributing anything on defense."

– Cory at 4:03

"I didn't want to tell you this, Core. I knew your mom was old but did you know that she lost her virginity at the Calgary Olympics? [Cory: Fuck you, Shoresy.] Which is crazy, cause Liam's mom lost hers to a luger in Lillehammer."

– Shoresy at 4:20

"[Liam: Fuck you, Shoresy] Fuck you, Liam. Your mom calls me "daddy" so much I feel like I should be takin' you out to the yard to throw the old pigskin around. [Liam: Fuck you!] Don't talk to your father like that!"

– Shoresy at 4:29

"I'm Jory Jordan with the Sudbury Kids Sport Report, Europa Edition, reminding you that "Nordic" is just a letter or two away from "No dick"."

– Jory Jordan at 9:24

"You're called the "Sudbury Five"? [Loic: Yeah.] So dumb. [Loic: What?] The Sudbury Five sounds like what a newspaper would call like some fuckin' killers awaiting trial. [Loic: No, it doesn't.] [Melodie: It does a bit.] Sudbury Five sounds like some fuckin' bodies pulled from a lake."

– Shoresy at 11:46