"You look so good I'm in danger of suffering a penile injury in my pants."

– Shoresy at 0:10

"Actually, I'll need to borrow your service dog for this first call. [Ziigwan: Fuck you, Shoresy.] Emotional support animal or whatever. But first, can you give it some fuckin' chow?"

– Ziigwan at 3:40

"Gorgeous Gord Gallant. [Gord: Fancy seeing you here. To what do I owe the pleasure?] [Shoresy: It's going to be a real long road if you want to talk like a fruit, Gord.] [Gord: Twice in two days, Ziigwan. How'd I get so lucky?] [Shoresy: What does he mean, 'twice in two days'?] Ziigwan (imitating Shoresy): What does he mean? [Shoresy: Huh?] I banged him on Zoom last night. [Shoresy: Eww!] [Gord: Was a first for me.] Not for me. [Shoresy: On this computer?!]"

– Ziigwan at 3:58

"Bring a kid to playland, he's gonna go ball-pittin'."

– Shoresy at 12:51

"You're an idiot if you think you're gonna get her, Michaels. [Michaels: I know, Shoresy.] You can't compare to Sanguinet. He's tall, long hair and a long dick. [Miigwan: OK, Shoresy.] You're short with a weird face. [Michaels: OK, Shoresy.]"

– Shoresy at 13:13

"I'm Jory Jordan and this is a Sudbury Kids Sports Report exclusive. A respected coach, feared player, beloved boyfriend and overall standup guy. That guest was unable to make it today so instead we've got formerly number 69, Shore."

– Jory Jordan at 18:16

"We're watching the same game, yeah? The reputation for tough hockey here has expired. Undeserving."

– Teppo Maki at 21:48